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Have you ever unintentionally upset someone by being too honest?


summerlusk
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23 hours ago, summerlusk said:

Have you ever said exactly what you were thinking and they got mad at you for it even though it was the truth? It doesn’t have to necessarily be an opinion, just stating a fact.. like about someone else.

Normally when something upsetting is said, both parties are already upset... *shrugs*

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2 hours ago, Sheila said:

Yep, lots of times, he'll be upset until I proven him to be wrong. 

What do you mean?

50 minutes ago, Kaitlind said:

Yes my ex best friend got mad at me for saying the truth and quit speaking to me. That was 2 years ago...

Yeah, that’s what I mean. And sometimes they know it’s true, but they get mad that you said it. 

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Umm when I was younger I used to be upset easily if someone was being way to honest, so whenever I had to explain something to someone I would try to be as soft as possible. Nowadays, well I think life has made me waaay much stronger handling criticism, but, sometimes I can be very harsh if I feel that it is needed. But for example, I think it depends on the situation. If I know someone is really messed up ,and they already blame theirselves too much for their action and, if I speak in a rude way it's going to make them feel even worse and it's not going to be helpful at all, then there is no chance I'm not talking "in a harsh way" , I'd try to be as gentle as possible, like how I would have wanted when I was fealing "weaker". I mean when you already have a lot of sadness and stress, and someone you trust a lot comes here talking in a very very rude way... By the way I love seeing how people express themselves first so I know how I can interact in a way that is neither too agresive or way too friendly.        

And when it comes to love life; if I like/am interested in someone of course I am going to be honest, and I guarantee you if you are having a hard time I will try to help you and I will tell you helpful advices that would feel like one of the warmest comforting needed hughs... To cope with the harsh truth that most of the times must be spoken.

 

Of course we have people that deserve a "more agresive, direct" way of "approaching". I love giving that "virtual Hugh" despites, unfortunately other times it has to be a "virtual slap" in order to cope with my morals and my mental  health.

If I were always giving and giving love freely I would end up depressed and severy ill so I'd rather keep a balance.

Don't be afraid to look for yourself and be selfish from time to time.

There are a few people that deserve your love.

You can just keep a neutral way of approaching strangers 

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On 12/5/2021 at 2:11 PM, summerlusk said:

Have you ever said exactly what you were thinking and they got mad at you for it even though it was the truth? It doesn’t have to necessarily be an opinion, just stating a fact.. like about someone else.

Proudly, too often to count.

All moral people will fight the ignorance in their fellow man.

The truth hurts, to those who have to face that they were wrong in their moral thinking, but scriptures are clear that correcting poor thinking is a person's greatest show of love.

It applies the most in the authors and y eyes, to fathers towards sons.

I have a long ban record to show for my efforts.

Regards

DL

 

 

 

On 12/6/2021 at 11:07 AM, Sheila said:

Yep, lots of times, he'll be upset until I proven him to be wrong. 

Face to face, that is not usually hard.

In these places, where people can run away or deflect to a less intelligent or moral person, who does not see through them, is a route most take.

You almost never see a post where someone admits to having reversed their view, from either wing.

Regards

DL

 

On 12/6/2021 at 2:17 PM, SummertimmeSahneh said:

Don't be afraid to look for yourself and be selfish from time to time.

There are a few people that deserve your love.

You can just keep a neutral way of approaching strangers 

There is so much wrong with your thinking, selfish gene wise, you do not recognize your default position between cooperation and competition to be cooperation and doing the good as compared to competing which is seen as evil by the loser.

Your selfish gene is your best friend.

Do not stop your DNA from showing you are one of the fittest by not allowing your good side to shine.

All people, we should, in a sense, love. We should all think more universalist like.

Free love is not much in a universalist system, when respect is what must be earned.

Individuals in a species like ours, earns respect instinctively by by co-operation, not neutrality.

Human to human good is better than evil or neutrality.

Regards

DL  

On 12/6/2021 at 1:35 PM, Kaitlind said:

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I unfortunately have. My mom is really sensitive. She talks about her health problems a lot. She has legitimate problems and I don’t mind her talking about them, but if I bring up something about my health issues she’d say, “you’re always sick. All you ever do is talk about what’s wrong with you.”  I bit my tongue for the longest time, but one day I was exasperated and brought up the fact that she talks about her health problems all the time. She was totally insulted and absolutely furious. It did not go well. 

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I have no filter and I never lie. I’ve hurt people by accident a lot. Like calling things as they are or being blunt. Working in my communication has helped. They way you word things can be the difference from breaking through to someone or losing them completely. We’re Fleshy sacs or Neurons trying to handle all our feelings. 

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On 12/5/2021 at 1:11 PM, summerlusk said:

Have you ever said exactly what you were thinking and they got mad at you for it even though it was the truth? It doesn’t have to necessarily be an opinion, just stating a fact.. like about someone else.

Yes. I came out and told my mother that I felt like she looks for things to get upset when it comes to our relationship. I continued to tell her that we spend a lot of time disagreeing and fighting when we do communicate.  We were already into it. She's was mad anyway and nitpicking for reasons. 

What could it hurt already? I'm mostly on her s*hit list anyway. I had nothing more to lose. 

I was completely caught off guard by her reaction after I said it. She calmed down. She apologized and said that we should spend more time together. It completely took me by surprise. I was thinking "This never happens." 

I didn't know what to say. 

 

 

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5 hours ago, summerlusk said:

What do you mean?

Yeah, that’s what I mean. And sometimes they know it’s true, but they get mad that you said it. 

Talking about my husband 😆 Everytime, my husband thinks something or he's right about something and I prove the truth 

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