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Do you believe that when you get married, you marry your spouse’s entire family?


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Yep. Once your marry your boyfriend or your girlfriend, their family becomes your family as well. 

18 minutes ago, Saphire Cotto said:

 But you can associate with who ever you want to.

Having been married for 11 years and now divorced going on for 2 years. Several of her family members, like her mom & her sister, hated me from day one and it seemed to get worse every year. I would have LOVED to keep them all out of the picture. But she was the reason why her sister kept coming around & starting fights. She hated my family too. Mostly just my mother and my grandmother. I don't blame her for hating my brother. 

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7 minutes ago, Mr.Dawn said:

Yep. Once your marry your boyfriend or your girlfriend, their family becomes your family as well. 

Having been married for 11 years and now divorced going on for 2 years. Several of her family members, like her mom & her sister, hated me from day one and it seemed to get worse every year. I would have LOVED to keep them all out of the picture. But she was the reason why her sister kept coming around & starting fights. She hated my family too. Mostly just my mother and my grandmother. I don't blame her for hating my brother. 

That sounds likes such a drag 

 

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Just now, Saphire Cotto said:

That sounds likes such a drag 

It was. It got worse when we had k'ids. Then her family walked all over me. Until we got divorced. Now it's much better. 

At least now with my girlfriend. I get along with her family. They're nothing like the nightmare I had to put up with. 

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Just now, Mr.Dawn said:

It was. It got worse when we had k'ids. Then her family walked all over me. Until we got divorced. Now it's much better. 

At least now with my girlfriend. I get along with her family. They're nothing like the nightmare I had to put up with. 

That’s such an upgrade! Now you can relax and not have to be on edge 

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52 minutes ago, Saphire Cotto said:

Well litterally you are family with them after marriage, But you can associate with who ever you want to.

I agree with this. But it’s always important to try. 

30 minutes ago, Mr.Dawn said:

Yep. Once your marry your boyfriend or your girlfriend, their family becomes your family as well. 

Having been married for 11 years and now divorced going on for 2 years. Several of her family members, like her mom & her sister, hated me from day one and it seemed to get worse every year. I would have LOVED to keep them all out of the picture. But she was the reason why her sister kept coming around & starting fights. She hated my family too. Mostly just my mother and my grandmother. I don't blame her for hating my brother. 

Yes, there is only one person I have a bad relationship with the family. Although, I do believe by default the families’ of old relationships hate me for no reason. 

21 minutes ago, Mr.Dawn said:

At least now with my girlfriend. I get along with her family. They're nothing like the nightmare I had to put up with. 

Good. That makes me happy to hear. 

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2 hours ago, bones said:

I agree with this. But it’s always important to try. 

As to the topic itself,  I'm surprised you're not married to be completely honest. 

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Yes, there is only one person I have a bad relationship with the family. Although, I do believe by default the families’ of old relationships hate me for no reason. 

One thing that helps both families liking you and your partner is this: Do  not run to your family members and bad mouth each other or talk about your problems. What you're doing is putting unneeded strain and stress onto your relationship whether you think you are or not. And the last thing you want is one family or the other getting involved and making things more difficult when you two break up and want to get back together. When my mother asks, I always say "Everything is great." Because I don't want to give them any reason to hate on my girlfriend. I want them to like her because that makes it easier on me. 

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4 hours ago, Mr.Dawn said:

Yep. Once your marry your boyfriend or your girlfriend, their family becomes your family as well. 

Having been married for 11 years and now divorced going on for 2 years. Several of her family members, like her mom & her sister, hated me from day one and it seemed to get worse every year. I would have LOVED to keep them all out of the picture. But she was the reason why her sister kept coming around & starting fights. She hated my family too. Mostly just my mother and my grandmother. I don't blame her for hating my brother. 

That s*cks. Do you have any idea why they hated you?

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My husband and I have been been together for 10 years, married for 6. We had both been married before and did not want to get married to each other. After being pressured over the years by his parents to get married we did. After we got married his parents became totally unbearable. They put us through so many things and we allowed them to make us go through so many changes that really took a toll on our sanity. In the end we realized how much we love each other. He still sees his parents because they are well, his parents. I never go. I refuse to speak with any of them (its a long and u**y story full of tox*city, mind games, and anxiety caused mostly by his mother). When they ask about me he tells them to pick up the phone to call me and ask. We both know they will never do that because they know they wronged us horribly and they realize they are super lucky that he still shows up to family things. The only reason why he gives them the time of day is because of his daughter. What makes me sad is that if they weren't so underhanded and insufferable, I would still have a friendship with them. I am happy though that my husband and I can have difficulties like these and still separate what we have together from everything else. We both have our own free will and free thought. We don't have to agree on everything, however we do understand that we still have to talk about it and make it right. It took me a long time to find a relationship like this one where we are both level headed, caring and ground each other and it was definitely worth the wait. Crappy in-laws is all I have to deal with so I am good with it. 

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13 minutes ago, Bruja626 said:

My husband and I have been been together for 10 years, married for 6. We had both been married before and did not want to get married to each other. After being pressured over the years by his parents to get married we did. After we got married his parents became totally unbearable. They put us through so many things and we allowed them to make us go through so many changes that really took a toll on our sanity. In the end we realized how much we love each other. He still sees his parents because they are well, his parents. I never go. I refuse to speak with any of them (its a long and u**y story full of tox*city, mind games, and anxiety caused mostly by his mother). When they ask about me he tells them to pick up the phone to call me and ask. We both know they will never do that because they know they wronged us horribly and they realize they are super lucky that he still shows up to family things. The only reason why he gives them the time of day is because of his daughter. What makes me sad is that if they weren't so underhanded and insufferable, I would still have a friendship with them. I am happy though that my husband and I can have difficulties like these and still separate what we have together from everything else. We both have our own free will and free thought. We don't have to agree on everything, however we do understand that we still have to talk about it and make it right. It took me a long time to find a relationship like this one where we are both level headed, caring and ground each other and it was definitely worth the wait. Crappy in-laws is all I have to deal with so I am good with it. 

I’m sorry to hear that you in-laws s*ck. Does he get along with your side of the family?

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6 hours ago, Mr.Dawn said:

Having been married for 11 years and now divorced going on for 2 years. Several of her family members, like her mom & her sister, hated me from day one

This seems to be common. Life be like that sometimes.

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14 hours ago, summerlusk said:

That s*cks. Do you have any idea why they hated you?

well, her ex fiancé went crying to her parents after she left him. He thought she had been cheating on him prior when that wasn't the case at all. So half of her family showed up on my doorstep the next day to my house and picked her up. Her mom said they weren't leaving without her.

Aggravated she called him for an explanation. He said that this was pay back and that she was a whore. So after all of that. I was painted in a very bad light to them and that was something I could really never escape. Even worse is that it didn't help when we'd fight and she'd run and talk sh'it to her parents about me which made it that much worse. 

Her ex fiancé was very well liked by her family. They all liked him. But after she left him and got with me. I was always viewed as an a'sshole by all of them. Her sister, Ashley, went on Myspace with her ex fiancé  and openly talked  sh'it about me after the wedding and stated how she didn't claim me as a brother in law. That I was a douchebag & proceeded to try and degrade and emasculate me in any way that she could. It was very upsetting. 

You know, honestly had I known her family was this tox'ic. I would have left just for that reason alone. I had no idea that Ashley was going to antagonize me for the next 11 years on and off. When I kicked her out of my home because she was disrespectful, she was stealing from me, and she was putting words in my mouth. So after I threw Ashley out. She went to the neighbor's crying, claimed she was my wife, and accused me of r'ape. The police were never called but the neighbors went to my family and told them everything she said. They were embarrassed and pissed off about it.  That should have been a wake up call right there that I should have left my ex wife then. I didn't know this was just the start of it. I didn't know that Ashley was this big of a psycho. I didn't know she was going to send men over to beat on me and thr***en my life. She bragged on several occasions on how she had someone ki**ed & that ex boyfriend did go to p*****n for m**der and she was investigated for being an accomplice which she got out of. She bragged about it and mocked me saying that I would be next if I pissed her off again. She was f'ucking nightmare. My ex wife always had her around and she'd always start s'hit. 

Looking back. I have no clue why I stuck around. 

 

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2 hours ago, Mr.Dawn said:

well, her ex fiancé went crying to her parents after she left him. He thought she had been cheating on him prior when that wasn't the case at all. So half of her family showed up on my doorstep the next day to my house and picked her up. Her mom said they weren't leaving without her.

Aggravated she called him for an explanation. He said that this was pay back and that she was a whore. So after all of that. I was painted in a very bad light to them and that was something I could really never escape. Even worse is that it didn't help when we'd fight and she'd run and talk sh'it to her parents about me which made it that much worse. 

Her ex fiancé was very well liked by her family. They all liked him. But after she left him and got with me. I was always viewed as an a'sshole by all of them. Her sister, Ashley, went on Myspace with her ex fiancé  and openly talked  sh'it about me after the wedding and stated how she didn't claim me as a brother in law. That I was a douchebag & proceeded to try and degrade and emasculate me in any way that she could. It was very upsetting. 

You know, honestly had I known her family was this tox'ic. I would have left just for that reason alone. I had no idea that Ashley was going to antagonize me for the next 11 years on and off. When I kicked her out of my home because she was disrespectful, she was stealing from me, and she was putting words in my mouth. So after I threw Ashley out. She went to the neighbor's crying, claimed she was my wife, and accused me of r'ape. The police were never called but the neighbors went to my family and told them everything she said. They were embarrassed and pissed off about it.  That should have been a wake up call right there that I should have left my ex wife then. I didn't know this was just the start of it. I didn't know that Ashley was this big of a psycho. I didn't know she was going to send men over to beat on me and thr***en my life. She bragged on several occasions on how she had someone ki**ed & that ex boyfriend did go to p*****n for m**der and she was investigated for being an accomplice which she got out of. She bragged about it and mocked me saying that I would be next if I pissed her off again. She was f'ucking nightmare. My ex wife always had her around and she'd always start s'hit. 

Looking back. I have no clue why I stuck around. 

 

I don’t know why they liked her ex-fiancé, he sounds extremely immature and unlikable for starting all that s***t. I already don’t like him and I don’t even know him, lol.

3 hours ago, Mr.Dawn said:

You know, honestly had I known her family was this tox'ic. I would have left just for that reason alone. I had no idea that Ashley was going to antagonize me for the next 11 years on and off. When I kicked her out of my home because she was disrespectful, she was stealing from me, and she was putting words in my mouth. So after I threw Ashley out. She went to the neighbor's crying, claimed she was my wife, and accused me of r'ape. The police were never called but the neighbors went to my family and told them everything she said. They were embarrassed and pissed off about it.  That should have been a wake up call right there that I should have left my ex wife then. I didn't know this was just the start of it. I didn't know that Ashley was this big of a psycho. I didn't know she was going to send men over to beat on me and thr***en my life. She bragged on several occasions on how she had someone ki**ed & that ex boyfriend did go to p*****n for m**der and she was investigated for being an accomplice which she got out of. She bragged about it and mocked me saying that I would be next if I pissed her off again. She was f'ucking nightmare. My ex wife always had her around and she'd always start s'hit. 

Looking back. I have no clue why I stuck around. 

 

Just wow. So how did you meet your ex-wife? Sounds like someone I wouldn’t be likely to meet unless I went to a bad area. I know that it’s possible to meet someone like that anywhere though..

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58 minutes ago, summerlusk said:

I don’t know why they liked her ex-fiancé, he sounds extremely immature and unlikable for starting all that s***t. I already don’t like him and I don’t even know him, lol.

He had a way of making people like him through first impressions and he could be really nice and charming. He did have a way with people.

He and I went to school together. We used to hang out. But he was very fickle and a user. He was probably one of the biggest cheap skates I've ever met as he did not like to spend money and did anything he could to avoid doing so. But if I was going to pay his way, he was on board. 

Which was one major reason why she left him. She got sick of dealing with his financial problems because he'd make her pay his rent so he could go play with his money. He also had a bad habit of sh'it talking his friends behind their backs. He was just a t'oxic person over all. 

He also didn't want to pay for her ring or the wedding and I think that's what ki**ed their relationship. He went to her mom asking if she'd give her an engagement ring.  

My family paid for the wedding and I bought one ring, which she quit wearing when I  gave her my father's 3 thousand dollar engagement ring, which was really nice, from when he and my mother were married. My mom is remarried as my father left her for another woman and she kept that ring to give to me one day until I got married. 

My ex wife hocked it for 50 dollars after I told her to keep it and give it to our daughter or our son some day. 

1 hour ago, summerlusk said:

Just wow. So how did you meet your ex-wife?

We went to school together and we had mutual friends. Just one day she started visiting me at my house as a friend. We weren't sleeping together at that time. But she was having a lot of problems with her ex at the time. 

 

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5 hours ago, Mr.Dawn said:

He had a way of making people like him through first impressions and he could be really nice and charming. He did have a way with people.

He and I went to school together. We used to hang out. But he was very fickle and a user. He was probably one of the biggest cheap skates I've ever met as he did not like to spend money and did anything he could to avoid doing so. But if I was going to pay his way, he was on board. 

Which was one major reason why she left him. She got sick of dealing with his financial problems because he'd make her pay his rent so he could go play with his money. He also had a bad habit of sh'it talking his friends behind their backs. He was just a t'oxic person over all. 

He also didn't want to pay for her ring or the wedding and I think that's what ki**ed their relationship. He went to her mom asking if she'd give her an engagement ring.  

My family paid for the wedding and I bought one ring, which she quit wearing when I  gave her my father's 3 thousand dollar engagement ring, which was really nice, from when he and my mother were married. My mom is remarried as my father left her for another woman and she kept that ring to give to me one day until I got married. 

My ex wife hocked it for 50 dollars after I told her to keep it and give it to our daughter or our son some day. 

We went to school together and we had mutual friends. Just one day she started visiting me at my house as a friend. We weren't sleeping together at that time. But she was having a lot of problems with her ex at the time. 

 

I see. Well, her sister and her ex-boyfriend should both be in p*****n if that’s true about her having someone ki**ed by him. 

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2 hours ago, summerlusk said:

I see. Well, her sister and her ex-boyfriend should both be in p*****n if that’s true about her having someone ki**ed by him. 

He's in j*il. She's not. But she bragged and confessed to all of us that she had a part in it. She should be in p*****n. She shouldn't have k'ids either. Her estranged brother said she should have been locked up a long time ago. 

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18 minutes ago, Mr.Dawn said:

He's in j*il. She's not. But she bragged and confessed to all of us that she had a part in it. She should be in p*****n. She shouldn't have k'ids either. Her estranged brother said she should have been locked up a long time ago. 

Yep, she should be in j*il for that. I’m glad to hear at least he is.

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