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Are You Genuinely Gay or Straight?


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I feel like there are a lot of people who say they are gay then when the time comes they bail. Why is that?

Like people who date gay guys just because that dude is rich? Or women who are with other women only because they like the man that woman is with…

Why are people like this? Like why are there so many people who say they are no yet the pieces don’t fit?

Have you met someone like this?

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I am Pan-se*ual meaning my se*ual attraction isn't gender orientated and more person orientated, so I really cant understand people who fake their attraction for some personal benefit. In saying that, my partner is a straight man so I am perceived as a straight women, so this question feels very relevant to me. Regardless, people who fake their se*uality for attention or some other type of personal gain aren't actively experiencing a real connection with someone and I think that's punishment enough for that behavior. 

   

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I met someone who said they wanted to be with me, "I just want to be with a woman" yet she was straight, married and had little ones. It was so weird, but I found out that she wasn't happy with who she was with, I gave her advice, I made it clear that I didn't want to be with her from the beginning, yet she kept flirting with me. I had to try to avoid her in every way possible, one final message I remember "I just want to make him jealous". So, that stuck with me.

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I'm straight. I've been into women my whole life and I have never questioned it. I've never doubted it. I did have a few gay friends. One guy that I was friends with wanted to get physical and begged to give me oral. I knew right then and there that I definitely was not gay.

Most of the women I've been with are bi-se*ual. It doesn't bother me one bit. 

I was made fun of in middle school, in Arkansas, because people spread rumors that I was gay when I wasn't. That was debunked my 8th grade year.  I got made fun of and ostracized as a result. So I know what it feels like socially for someone who is h*mose*ual to go through that. It was a very difficult time for me. I never got that feeling of acceptance when I lived with my father. 

When I came home to Missouri and went through high school. Everyone was nice. g*rls didn't turn me down because they thought I was "gay" or out of fear that their friends would ostracize them for having talked to me. 

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Just cause someone is attracted to a gender and you’re part of that gender doesn’t mean they are into you specifically and automatically just by virtue of being said gender. People have types. If you’re into bears a think might not do it for ya.  Also I think it’s more than fair to bail if a romantic or se*ual situation isn’t what you thought it would be.  
 

I say this as an outside observer since I’m Demi ace and very rarely experience attraction as most do.

But on the bailing I liken it to non se*ual things. Like I showed up to job interview that said it was for a call center but the interview location was an abandoned warehouse. I dipped because it screamed human trafficking. or like I’ve had sandwiches that were super gr*ss despite looking amazing. Nothing wrong with admitting something just ain’t working for ya and peacing outta there. 

Just now, Ghostie said:

Just cause someone is attracted to a gender and you’re part of that gender doesn’t mean they are into you specifically and automatically just by virtue of being said gender. People have types. If you’re into bears a think might not do it for ya.  Also I think it’s more than fair to bail if a romantic or se*ual situation isn’t what you thought it would be.  
 

I say this as an outside observer since I’m Demi ace and very rarely experience attraction as most do.

But on the bailing I liken it to non se*ual things. Like I showed up to job interview that said it was for a call center but the interview location was an abandoned warehouse. I dipped because it screamed human trafficking. or like I’ve had sandwiches that were super gr*ss despite looking amazing. Nothing wrong with admitting something just ain’t working for ya and peacing outta there. 


 

 

now it did take me a majorly long time to figure out the Demi ace thing. Seriously just assumed I was broken or doing it wrong. I spent a lot of time m*******e as a pan experiencing s***t like “corrective” *******ation and just letting a ton of people take advantage of me trying to “be normal” and “not a prude”

it’s okay to change who you are as you figure it out, this stuff is complicated. 
 

honestly I’m probably more ace than Demi ^^;; but there are a few feelings I never get outside a relationship that I do feel inside one. I’m still figuring myself out tbh. Labels are not perfect. The labels are more there to help other people out so people don’t wind up wasting their time. 

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I jokingly say i’m “fake gay” a lot but my partner is non-binary, literally without gender lol. Sometimes i do wonder if i actually am and then i remember that’s just all the religious t****a messing with my head. 

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(Mature response 18+) I have met plenty. I am bi, but in a period of my life only dated women because it felt better to laugh with a girl then fight with a man. ..and that's how it was going personally for me.Like how buddies of the same se* like men have their guy time and friends, some g*rls want that to so to be in love with someone you could laugh with, was great. But alot of these 'lesbians'" would be in bed with me one day saying they loved it to the point of........yea...with evidence. Some g*rls even a bit, obsessive.....but every single one except one went back to dating a man after saying they were a lesbian or in bed with one while dating me. Now I'm just looking for someone who makes me laugh, male or female. But I don't love like I used to....it kinda withered through problems and heart aches 

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