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I don’t expect anyone to relate but has anyone else ever felt this way?


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  • Elites

(Personal pet peeve) Why do people feel the need to ask if I’m working or going to college. Usually first they’ll ask if I’m working if I say I’m not they’ll ask if im in college if im not they ask why not? Well why’s that the first thing people usually ask?At first I thought it was cause they wanna keep a conversation  going but do they REALLY care if im working or attending college? or do they just want to feel like they’re above of me or that it’s what measures someone’s worth when it isn’t. I don’t think everyone was meant for the same path , study go to school work 9 to 5. Some people aren’t book smart and are usually talented in tons of other ways I’ve always found I’m best at things having to do with beauty and art..not to mention people think studying cosmetology isn’t studying just because it isn’t college And That’s what we’re all told we should do but why do I feel like people criticize you if you don’t chose to live up to that “standard” Also..why is being a content creator not considered a job even though I’m making more money then I’ve made in any of my other jobs? I just don’t get it man. Im sorry that I didn’t go to college to become a lawyer I can’t pretend to have interests that I won’t be happy doing in my lifetime. Being compared to my family members has always made me insecure because everyone in my family is so studious and has good careers and I’m the disappointment cause I didn’t amount to the standard..whatever 

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There’s a conversation format a lot of boomers learned in school back when they actually taught etiquette and such called Ford.

Family

Occupation

Recreation

Dreams

it’s like a template to get to know someone or do safe small talk. 
once I understood this was a thing a lot of the dumb stuff people say clicked. They are just desperate to make conversation but for whatever reason are leaning on this crutch. Maybe social anxiety? I look much better at work than in normal person because NPC mode basically gives me a script of what to say, so I feel that. Talking is hard. 
 

Ford is a little outdated though cause it’s build on a 50’s assumption of how the world works. We really need to update it cause the premise is good. 

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1 hour ago, pinkagaricus said:

Also..why is being a content creator not considered a job even though I’m making more money then I’ve made in any of my other jobs?

Why are you not just telling them your job is creating content? That is your job no?

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  • Elites
18 minutes ago, Onision said:

Why are you not just telling them your job is creating content? That is your job no?

I told this person that asked if I had a job that I make content and it’s like they acted as if it wasn’t a job saying “are you at least going to college”

58 minutes ago, Ghostie said:

There’s a conversation format a lot of boomers learned in school back when they actually taught etiquette and such called Ford.

Family

Occupation

Recreation

Dreams

it’s like a template to get to know someone or do safe small talk. 
once I understood this was a thing a lot of the dumb stuff people say clicked. They are just desperate to make conversation but for whatever reason are leaning on this crutch. Maybe social anxiety? I look much better at work than in normal person because NPC mode basically gives me a script of what to say, so I feel that. Talking is hard. 
 

Ford is a little outdated though cause it’s build on a 50’s assumption of how the world works. We really need to update it cause the premise is good. 

I never thought of it that way,could be 

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Usually when I would mention certain jobs I was interested in, I would be told I wouldn't make enough money. It's like what am I supposed to do then? Go to college and be a Doctor? Because that's not what I want to do with my life. Not to mention family members rubbing other people's successes in your face. For example, they will mention that someone just got married and bought their first house and it's like, sorry I don't have a perfect life like them 🙄

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  • Elites
2 hours ago, Kaitlind said:

Usually when I would mention certain jobs I was interested in, I would be told I wouldn't make enough money. It's like what am I supposed to do then? Go to college and be a Doctor? Because that's not what I want to do with my life. Not to mention family members rubbing other people's successes in your face. For example, they will mention that someone just got married and bought their first house and it's like, sorry I don't have a perfect life like them 🙄

Yeah I really dislike that feeling 😒

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Normalize responding to personal questions with a question. If someone asks you something, you have a right to inquire why they want to know.
 

Especially if it’s something personal and they keep digging, I will turn it around on them at some point. Say “why do you ask” or why are you inquiring ? If they say “oh to get to know you” you can be vague with them or say “it’s a complicated situation I’d rather not rehash” You can always say too “I’m not comfortable answering this question right now” No one is entitled to your business and there’s plenty of other questions they can move on to until you do choose to explain. That’s your prerogative 😜😉 Pay attention to how they respond if you decline a question, boundaries are everything !! 

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On 8/12/2021 at 3:39 PM, pinkagaricus said:

(Personal pet peeve) Why do people feel the need to ask if I’m working or going to college. Usually first they’ll ask if I’m working if I say I’m not they’ll ask if im in college if im not they ask why not? Well why’s that the first thing people usually ask?At first I thought it was cause they wanna keep a conversation  going but do they REALLY care if im working or attending college? or do they just want to feel like they’re above of me or that it’s what measures someone’s worth when it isn’t. I don’t think everyone was meant for the same path , study go to school work 9 to 5. Some people aren’t book smart and are usually talented in tons of other ways I’ve always found I’m best at things having to do with beauty and art..not to mention people think studying cosmetology isn’t studying just because it isn’t college And That’s what we’re all told we should do but why do I feel like people criticize you if you don’t chose to live up to that “standard” Also..why is being a content creator not considered a job even though I’m making more money then I’ve made in any of my other jobs? I just don’t get it man. Im sorry that I didn’t go to college to become a lawyer I can’t pretend to have interests that I won’t be happy doing in my lifetime. Being compared to my family members has always made me insecure because everyone in my family is so studious and has good careers and I’m the disappointment cause I didn’t amount to the standard..whatever 

First of all, I know people that have a university degree that cannot find a "stable job" and they usually have to spends lots of months up to 5-6 month each 2-3 years because of not getting a contract renewal. 

So if you are taking a time for you, and you are not working or studying it should not bother anyone else because it's your choice.

Second, it's unbelievable how we cannot still get that nowadays society works different and there are different ways you can find to sustain yourself.

I feel that there is a bit of everything mixed and also "that feeling of superiority" because "oh no I am really tired of this  job , I have to make others feel like trash because I hate my life".

You do you. 

My mom, hates when I choose to expend a few weeks without studying or working. It's like NO you have to do things don't rest. Better organize your own way, I mean right now for example, I cannot handle too much pressure so I have to adapt to adversity and find ways to make things enjoyable. 

Most people that complain, about others, in my opinion are scared of change .

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