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Do you like being desired?


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30 minutes ago, t*rminated said:

If you are seen as att**ctive.

Do you like being seen as desirable by the other gender?

Does being wanted make you feel confident?

I feel confident when I achieve goals.

I like feeling desirable for the ones I'm interested in.

At first, It felt pleasent but now it is does not matter. Unless we are talking about for example, a video production, a certain aesthetic that you made just for being viral.

Then you take accountability of what people like.

But , by far the best thing is expressing yourself artistically how you want to , and if it is likeable then you feel grateful because you are being "yourself".

Nowadays, I only care truly about what my dearest say or if someone gives me nice arguments or constructive criticism.

On the other hand, a compliment is a gift , someone taking their time to tell you som*thing nice, it's like this cup of coffee that someone pays you. A kind gesture, there can be hidden hints, of course, but, let's take it easy and enjoy it.

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I don't know. I guess it depends on who is doing the desiring and how they do it.

Sure, I like being desired by the people I am att**cted to. I do not like being desired by people I am not att**cted to that act creepy or can't take a hint. 

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Posted (edited)

To be desired is also to have a little bit of mystery to me. What’s beautiful about all people is that we all have traits that make us unique whether we truly know it or not.

 

meh, just how I decided to answer this at the moment. 
🙏🏻

Edited by Steff
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I like to be desired but I don't want anyone to make it overt unless they are my partner. Just give me a quick look that says "I would" and then let's both move on with life and never think of it again.

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I guess it feels awkward due to some bad experiences of it turning into complete obsession. What am I doing? Where am I? Constantly. Show, show, show. Id rather be asked what's on my mind, or how I'm feeling..Show me what your talents are, tell me about your dreams.. connecting to find more about the person, more about me too. 

So I hit them up with goofy and really u**y pictures.

I agree with the poster about feeling confident about achievements. I like being a helping hand, and if I can make a person smile, that makes me feel confident in being able to do more. 

I'm not entirely confident with being in my skin. I have weird feelings about just being a human. I suppose that sounds weird. So the inner me is just like...ryan reynolds hd GIF

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Posted (edited)
12 hours ago, PoptartBarbie said:

Actually no . The thing that used to bother me is people overlooking things you say because of how you look.  I honestly try to make myself look worse a lot or downplay myself so people take me seriously. I'm not even that hot , I'm like slightly  on the better side of average I would say.  So I could only imagine super hot people.But 

I used to be realllllly bad looking and I've noticed people tend to take you more seriously If you don't look very good.and they will listen to you , not just humor you. For a while I kind of wanted to make myself look like a guy. I cut my hair very very short because I just really wanted people to like me . I thought I could maybe make friends without them wanting ***. Or maybe men would stop correcting everything I say or " mansplaining " stuff.

I just thought I might as well embrace being myself though and I guess am actively trying to be att**ctive again . And ya it makes me happier .k

Another bad thing is the more good looking you get as a girl other women are also super mean to you for no reason. Like they're mean anyways but. I have found if you look a little better it's worse. 

You're right about some women being super mean for no reason. I do agree with you for the most part. Some pretty g*rls were so friendly that I couldn't take them serious when they were being serious. Then some women who are gorgeous you do take seriously because of how they treat you. I think it's all about their attitude. 

My ex sister in law is really pretty. She's intolerable to be around. My ex wife warned me about her back when we first got together almost 12 years ago. Her name is Ashley. She was sweet when we met. I almost didn't believe the horror stories about her. I was told that she was a thief and that she was crazy. She was really charming like most sociopaths are. Then things started happening. She stole my ex wife's make up. Other small things. Money went missing out of my wallet. She started stealing from me. Then we got into it. She started screaming in my face and getting more and more belligerent and volatile. Then I kicked her out of my house. She went to the neighbors, fed them a story, then she called the sheriff, lied and said she was my wife and claimed that I s*ex*ually violated her. Which was bullsh*it. My ex wife told them that never happened. 

She has a reputation for being vindictive where I live. My co-workers even know who she is. A lot of people take her seriously. Because if you p*iss her off. She'll do som*thing to you. Some kind of ha*rassment. Send someone to your house. Make th*rea*ts to have someone beat your a*ss or have you k*i*ll*ed and she'll do it too. She was investigated by the feds because an ex boyfriend of hers m*u*rdered some guy that was messing with her. She bragged about it too. She's not the type to be taken lightly. 

She recently called DFS on me and I got investigated. Again. She claims that I'm a c*hild beater. The DFS girl found no marks and my k***s came to my defense and said that was all a lie. My former mother in law was so mad that Ashley did that, that she turned around and turned her into DFS because she's the one b**ting on her two sons. A doctor over in Oklahoma reported her for ab**e to one of her k***s. She's being investigated. She doesn't need to be a parent. She's so unstable that when angry all she'll do is yell, pick fist fights, and act completely out of her mind. She needs to be locked up in an insane asylum. Me and my k*ids have a nickname for her. We call her Crazy Town. They can't stand her.

She's gotten worse over the years. I can't wait for them to catch her doing som*thing illegal and lock her sorry a*ss up. She doesn't need to be out in society.  

 

Edited by Terminated
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17 minutes ago, PoptartBarbie said:

It's probably more of that. I'm very bubbly . 

Ya you're ex and her family sound like nightmares 

For a time she was great. But her family made me m*is*erable. That's one thing about a divorce that'll solve. I really don't have to put up with them anymore. 

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I personally have body dysmorphia  so I have a kind of interesting take.

I am att**ctive but not conventionally. However I struggled with loving my body and it often seems as though its different evertime I look in the mirror. 

So when I receive positive or even ***ual attention based on my appearance, I get the warm tingly feeling of validation lol. 

But in the same breath I am in a committed relationship and really only desire his attention and other 'feminine-non-binary'  attention. 

If the mental health is bad bad then I want to feel ***ually desired.

Tbh as a  socialworker I have many clients that have this issue and the answer for those that reaaaaaallllly need to feel desired, is mommy and daddy issues. 

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Recently I'm beginning to feel that my neighbor is becoming a little obsessed with me, and I don't like that feeling.  It's very kind of them to offer me things, compliments are often...telling me if I need anything at all to just come to them. But the fact that they are just there every time I come home...like they are waiting for me...says that they can see through my window, offers to come stay in my place to help...etc makes me feel uncomfortable... am I blowing this out of portion? It just feels off...

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2 minutes ago, brittniisundae said:

Recently I'm beginning to feel that my neighbor is becoming a little obsessed with me, and I don't like that feeling.  It's very kind of them to offer me things, compliments are often...telling me if I need anything at all to just come to them. But the fact that they are just there every time I come home...like they are waiting for me...says that they can see through my window, offers to come stay in my place to help...etc makes me feel uncomfortable... am I blowing this out of portion? It just feels off...

Yeah, like I said it can be creepy sometimes (to me), to the point where it can actually trigger my anxiety..

Edited by paperandsky
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Just now, paperandsky said:

Yeah, like I said it can be creepy sometimes  (to me), to the point where it can actually trigger my anxiety..

Exactly...feel like maybe it's becoming "too much". It makes me feel a little paranoid to just come home feeling like they're going to be there...and then there they are. I dont mind conversations and just the friendly things... but telling me stuff like "I look through your window" and wanting to come stay inside my place to "help"? That doesn't make me feel so good. I'm not trying to be mean at all, but I may try to avoid them in different ways. 😕

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6 hours ago, brittniisundae said:

Exactly...feel like maybe it's becoming "too much". It makes me feel a little paranoid to just come home feeling like they're going to be there...and then there they are. I dont mind conversations and just the friendly things... but telling me stuff like "I look through your window" and wanting to come stay inside my place to "help"? That doesn't make me feel so good. I'm not trying to be mean at all, but I may try to avoid them in different ways. 😕

Ugh, I know that uncomfortable feeling. Like how do you tactfully tell someone they're creeping you out a little bit and that their attention is unwanted? Hard to do without hurting their feelings or coming off sounding rude.

I had someone at work like that for a bit. They used to follow me around and really got on my nerves. I tried to be nice and gently rebuff at first, but I eventually just had to tell them bluntly to leave me alone. Thankfully, they no longer work there anymore. 

It's hard to know what to do in your situation. Maybe make them think you're in a relationship? Bring home your roughest, scariest looking friend and introduce them as your gf or bf. Lol, I dunno. 

Just be safe and if it persists too long or too far, then don't be afraid to speak up even if it means you have to be blunt. 

 

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  • Elites

No I don’t like to be noticed any time I’m in public I wish I could just be invisible. I don’t want to be wanted at the moment bc I’m working on myself.
Being wanted is only faltering if it’s from certain people unlike creepy joe from down the block with the lob sided mustache. Even then I don’t find myself att**ctive so in my mind anyone who “likes me” is an automatic liar or user. 
Maybe one day when I get to a point that I feel I actually am desirable than I would like and accept whatever comes with that. I am not worthy and even if I was rn uh no thanks

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Apparently I'm only desired by guys I'm not interested in so I don't like being desired in that way. Also no one ever hits on me when I'm in public so idk whether to be ok or offended by that lol. I mostly like being left alone anyway though.

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Posted (edited)
On 7/24/2021 at 1:28 AM, brittniisundae said:

Exactly...feel like maybe it's becoming "too much". It makes me feel a little paranoid to just come home feeling like they're going to be there...and then there they are. I dont mind conversations and just the friendly things... but telling me stuff like "I look through your window" and wanting to come stay inside my place to "help"? That doesn't make me feel so good. I'm not trying to be mean at all, but I may try to avoid them in different ways. 😕

Seeing as he's your neighbor and that you don't want to feud with him. I would tell him you don't like him looking into your windows. That you get that he likes you. But you're not into him & then politely asked if he could leave you alone. If he becomes defensive and rude. Then I'd thr*eaten to go to the police and file h*arassment against him. Some men obviously cannot comprehend that NO means NO.

There was a guy ***ually h***ssing my girlfriend on one of her social media accounts 7 months ago. He was making r*apist remarks at her. She kept telling him no. It really upset her. I talked to the guy. I told him to take NO for an answer or things were going to get very very u**y for him and that he definitely did not want to meet me. He mockingly asked if we were going to fight. I thr*eatened to shoot him with my 45. He backed off after that. 

He was just one guy that she went on one date with and decided she didn't like him. Because he was evidently a loser. She did mention he has messaged her in the past and begged her for s*ex and she's told him no many times before. 

I don't know why some men think it's okay to h*arass a woman like that. 

Edited by Terminated
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